RECOGNIZING AND REALIZING REALITY DURING TOUGH TIMES

During these times of acceptable social distancing, wearing masks in public, locking ourselves away from people and minimizing travel our society is not only suffering financially but we are all taking an emotional hit to one of the most important aspects of our lives – how we interact with, enjoy, thrive with and grow from other people.  It has been deemed necessary to lock ourselves behind closed doors (regardless of where or how we live), using that isolation as an excuse to avoid public spaces, work accountability, human interactions and (in some cases) the acceptance of altered personal hygiene practices and/or “public” dress codes while avoiding established standards, traditional expectations and interactive face-to-face communications.  Expectations tend to be "looser" when established ourselves and employers, not knowing what to expect or how to manage remotely, tend to accept what is provided rather than what could be accomplished.  Therein lies the problem - recognizing and realizing reality can be (and often are) two vastly different points upon the continuum of life.

Some (particularly those afraid or unwilling to learn from failure) proudly proclaim that setting low expectations will keep them from ever being disappointed – that living a life without stretch goals will shelter them from ever failing.  They live life wandering aimlessly upon roads paved by others – within the walls they have allowed to be constructed around them (having no windows from which to see nor doors from which to enter or leave).  They avoid unexpected detours or excursions while finding comfort and security in the things they know (and have seen) work in the past.  Those setting no (or low) expectations – fearing the pain of failure more than anticipating the rewards of success – may survive in life but will not experience the “thrill of victory (NOR the agony of defeat.”)  While accomplishing that which is expected and predictable they will rarely achieve their full potential – often maintaining life but rarely thriving in their personal endeavors. 

Far too often isolated individuals begin to canonize themselves – putting themselves first and everyone else a distant second.  They de-energize relationships by focusing upon the shortcomings of others (often to make up for a lack of confidence or low self-esteem in themselves).  When we pull others down – highlighting their deficiencies in an effort to elevate ourselves (surrounding ourselves with individuals who will not or cannot challenge us) – we may rise to the top of a pool of mediocrity but will rarely reach the pinnacle of individual success or accomplishment.  How can we expect our efforts to be maximized if we focus upon what could go wrong or what must be avoided rather than identifying alternative paths or actively seeking a direction that might provide better results as we initiate activity that will pull others with us to a better place?  Rather than seeing failure as a destination that should be avoided at all costs (or exploiting the failure of others for personal gain), much can be gained by viewing failure as a springboard to success – a flexible base that brings us back from life's depths to an innovative or previously untested solution.  If we seek to thrive (and live OUTSIDE of isolation) we must recognize that “getting up” is more significant (and critical) than “falling down.”  Believing that the “light at the end of a tunnel” is an opportunity not yet realized rather than a train heading towards us on a collision course reflects the assimilation of dreams into daily reality – but unless we at least venture out onto the track from our isolated privacy we will never recognize NOR experience that full potential.

Accepting that our own (or another individual’s) weaknesses are insurmountable results in our believing failure is final.  If, however, we acknowledge deficiencies or unexpected situations as bumps in the road as we relentlessly move forward seeking to accomplish our dreams – as we refuse to accept a disruption in our expectations as an “end game” to our efforts – we will find new ways to make things happen within a world that may look drastically different from any we had ever imagined.  Destiny becomes an inflexible limitation only when we allow ourselves to be controlled by a lack of expectations and a fear of failure.  We will lose in life only if we accept what we have and who we are as being all there is or ever could be rather than seeing our present as but a temporary resting point on our journey through today while seeking a different (and better) tomorrow.  All individuals have a past comprised of actions taken, relationships forged and things accomplished and a present comprised of the things they choose to do and relationships they wish to maintain.  The future, however, is defined by what we see as being possible which we allow ourselves to bring to fruition rather than how we allow ourselves to be constrained by things mandated absolutely by others – by what we permit ourselves to imagine rather than how we allow ourselves to be restricted by actions or individuals outside of our control. 

During these times of fear, constraint and uncertainty we must not only be safe but must also be practical while intentionally choosing how we wish to live and what we wish to accomplish.  If we choose to live in the memories of what we once had, we limit ourselves to things already experienced.  If we choose the comfort of what we have achieved, we limit ourselves to those things already accomplished.  If, however, our future is defined by the dreams and expectations expressed within pages of a book not yet fully written our possibilities will remain pathways to a reality limited only by our acceptance of those things we accept as unalterable or undeniable truths.  When our dreams become the things we anticipate and expect (rather than visions held tightly within the privacy of our individual hearts hidden by the darkness of night) – when we awaken to the inspiration our dreams provide as probability of things that will come (rather than things that might be but a distant possibility) – ONLY THEN will we be able to realize our full potential (rather than to live out the expectations of another).  Until we embark upon paths once hidden beneath the endlessly shifting sands of time while actively and intentionally seeking unrealized opportunity (instead of blindly accepting mandated priorities and expectations imposed upon us by others) will we be able to experience the world through wide open windows and experience life’s reality as being the promise and fulfillment of our dreams.