I recently spoke with an individual ready to pursue additional education so that she could switch fields completely and move as quickly away from her current job situation as possible. While she enjoyed the WORK she did, she did not respect her boss, was disappointed that an excellent co-worker recently left the organization, and felt the Organization’s Board of Directors had “no clue” as to what was happening within the company NOR did anyone care about its future. Her choice was to leave what she enjoyed to seek a greener pasture (as she had done before) – to be as but water over the dam, flowing freely from one situation to the next. Before talking about these issues, however, we talked about several different things when we met.
Her boss (new to the organization) did not have the proven experience or demonstrated ability to do his job. She was so wrapped up in her own feelings and frustrations, however, that she had never asked him how he felt, what he wanted to do (or needed help doing), or where he saw the organization going. She had talked herself into running away from what she liked to do (she liked “the work”) because of things she did not know OR seek to influence (she knew nothing about either her boss’ or the Board’s plans for the organization’s future). She was like a river flowing rapidly along its banks – blindly moving towards a fall from which there would be no return.
We eventually moved her past the rapids into an area of relative calm. She began to examine what she liked about the job (AND the organization), what she disliked, what she would need to see from a different position should she move. Many of the things she was seeking were deeply imbedded within her current position but she had been so busy looking at “what was not” that she lost sight of “what was.” We then discussed what (if anything) she could do to help maximize the “good” things about where she was while minimizing the “bad.”
There are many ways to move from one situation to another – but often we embark upon the most obvious escape route before seeking alternative resolutions. We do not simply draw a line in the sand from which we can begin anew – we call in the heavy equipment to excavate a trench that will isolate us from our situation once we have crossed the line. While such tactics WILL move us forward, they often create pain and close the door on any possibility of returning. Perhaps there are “kinder and gentler ways” to move from a bad situation to a better one than to burn our bridges – no matter how good that might feel in the heat of the moment.
