Far too
often we become disillusioned with what we have – seeking other rewards or
greener pastures – without first identifying OUR OWN role in the disappointment
we feel or the conflict we experience. People
confronted with occupational crisis or personal catastrophe rarely ask
themselves what they did (or did not do) to contribute to their situation. We tend to blame others for our shortcomings rather
than facing the reality that our own actions or decisions – our inaction or
avoidance – may be (or have caused) a major share of the problem standing
between us and accomplishment. We turn
our backs on relationships that have cooled rather than trying to feed the fire
without ever learning that the smoldering embers we thought had died could have
provided a more encompassing flame when properly fed and intentionally nurtured
than the most out of control wildfire that might unintentionally cross our
path. We walk away from jobs where we
have proven ourselves to seek opportunities provided by an unknown employer –
often running from what we know and choose to leave behind rather than enthusiastically
seeking new experiences after a thoughtful examination of what we might be
accepting as an alternative reality.
A number
of people seek something for nothing – asking not what they can do to
contribute to the well-being of others but rather what others can do to elevate
them. They expect their needs to be
provided for by others – be it income, a job, housing, comfort, warmth, validation,
acceptance, security or a plethora of other things that could (and should) be
internalized for intentional action rather than externalized for charitable contribution. They want all that others enjoy without
saving or investing the sweat equity needed to earn it. They want all things possible handed to them
without putting forth the effort needed to initiate change. Rather than lifting themselves up they seek
to bring others down – to take what they feel they deserve from the efforts of
others rather than contributing to what they receive through their own
initiative – creating equality at the lowest (rather than the highest) common
denominator. They seek support and
acceptance from others when they have failed rather than trying to lift
themselves up after acknowledging and owning their shortcomings – seeking
absolution rather than resolution. These
people are part of the problem with this world rather than part of the solution
– part of the illness we fight rather than the cure we wish to distribute.
Some people
seek to build upon (rather than accepting as a destination) “what is” as they pursue
what is not yet theirs – often seeking to realize things or situations not yet
fully imagined. They see life as
opportunity rather than entitlement.
They may fall two steps back when taking each single step into an undiscovered
world BUT never stop moving as they seek to accomplish their established goals
AND move from them once realized towards new horizons. These people accept responsibility for their
actions should they contribute to failure, either learning from the mistake so
that it will not be repeated or correcting the problem by addressing their
individual shortcomings. They see a
relationship as a living, breathing organism – something that needs to be
nurtured through constant attention (and compromise) rather than allowed to
drift aimlessly on its own without oversight.
They see our land of freedom and opportunity as a place where extreme
individual effort results in unprecedented reward – where nothing is outside
the reach of those willing to work hard to bring possibilities to fruition –
rather than an unlimited resource that will never run dry as it fills the needs
of those unwilling to work for their rewards.
These people are part of the solution in life – part of what “could be”
rather than rooted in “what is” or stuck in “what should be.” They seek (and eventually achieve) what is
possible rather than waiting for what life may eventually provide.
In order
to MAKE a difference in life, you must be willing to BE different. You cannot remain “one of the crowd” caught
up in what everyone else finds acceptable or “do things the same way they have
always been done” if you expect change.
If you feel the world owes you something you do not currently have (or
see any chance to accomplish or receive it) you should look to see what effort
you have invested to earn the reward you seek. If you think others are unfairly receiving the
rewards you deserve (and you should get them because they do), try to replicate
their investment (of time, experience, risk and ability) or intensify your own
internal efforts so you, too, might generate a favorable return (rather than
expecting it to be provided to you without effort or action). Our future lies firmly within our own control,
but what we see as “possible” may be vastly different than that seen by others based
on where we cast our vision and what we accept as a path towards an eventual
destination (rather than seeing each journey as a destination in and of itself).
