Some people identify the many things that could go wrong
then spend most of their waking hours trying to avoid those possibilities. They find themselves worrying so much about
what COULD go wrong that they have no time to consider what MIGHT go
right. Focusing on (and investing in)
negative outcomes tends to spiral into a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts –
when we are so convinced that something is going to fail it becomes our driving
force and we tend to make decisions, take steps and move towards that destination
– laser focused with blinders on and no alternative courses of action being
considered. If we think something it is
likely to become reality, it most likely will unless we intentionally change the
likelihood by taking positive and definitive action. Successful people (and those that are
generally happy) tend to hope for (and expect) the best possible outcome
(rather than worry and fret over the most likely disaster) while preparing for and
remaining cognizant of what COULD happen in order to formulate several courses
of action to take IF (not when) the worst begins to happen.
Examples of this kind of thinking are plentiful in society
today. Individuals looking to take on
new responsibilities or move to a new job often think about what will happen if
the move does not work out. Will their
old job still be available? Will they be
able to do something else in the new organization if it does not work out? Leaders seek employment contracts to protect
them rather than allowing their accomplishments make them irreplaceable. Many years ago workers at a local
manufacturing plant sought representation by a collective bargaining agent “in
case” the company shut down so they could receive severance pay and a cushion
upon which to land RATHER THAN seeking increased compensation to better reward
them for their results (the Union was ratified and the company shut down
without providing significant severance compensation). People go into relationships thinking about
how they will move on or who will be there if their partnership “goes south”
rather than seeing it as something more permanent that might take time, effort
and sacrifice to solidify. Simply put,
when people expect something to happen it often does. You overeat around the Holidays and know you
will gain weight and (surprisingly???) it happens. You make a New Year’s Resolution knowing that
you will probably abandon it by February and guess what? You start to get too busy to see it through
after about 3 weeks of half-hearted effort.
You begin a new project by thinking about why it could never work
because it is so different from what is being done now. If that is truly your thinking you should
probably never even begin to travel alternative paths because they will only
lead to dead ends, detours and cliffs that will keep you from moving forward.
An optimist is defined as a person who tends
to be hopeful and confident about the future or the success of something – one
who believes that this world is the best of all possible worlds and that good
must ultimately prevail over evil.
Perhaps it could also be stated that an optimist is one who believes
that the best possible outcome will be realized because of his or her personal
actions and the efforts of those involved and engaged. An optimist is not an unrealistic “rose
colored glasses” person but rather one whom fully invests in achieving a
positive outcome because he or she SEES and FEELS how their efforts will be
rewarded almost before they begin to move forward. Planning for the best DOES NOT (necessarily)
mean that one should expect something that would take a miracle to produce or
that has very little fiscal, practical or historical support to happen. Wishing and hoping for a BB gun as a child
may or may not bring those thoughts to fruition. Hoping for a way to be your company’s
President may be a realistic dream for some employees but may not fall within
the “reality” framework for many others.
Unless (and until), however, we begin to think like achievers – like a
“success just waiting to happen” – will we become anything more than
complainers or (even worse) finger pointers assigning blame as validation and
justification for why what we thought was going to happen did.
A pessimist is defined as a person who
tends to see the worst aspect of things or believe that the worst will happen -
a person who believes that this world is as bad as it could be or that evil
will ultimately prevail over good. While
pessimists are often right in the results they think they will attain it is
usually due to the fact that they set their sights on things that could go
wrong (and that, not surprisingly) end up just as they planned. One must envision success in order to taste
success – must expect accomplishment in order to experience it. A pessimist might share the definition of
expectations and results with an optimist BUT the expected results are usually
different so the outcomes are typically as different as night and day.
Successful individuals (and leaders)
RECOGNIZE the things that could go wrong but do not dwell upon them as their
efforts and energies are focused on what they EXPECT to happen (a positive
result). They often CONSIDER the
potential pitfalls of the steps they may have to take in order to plan
alternative courses of action but their focus is on what SHOULD be done if they
are to reach their destination rather than what COULD HAPPEN to derail them on their
journey to the prize.
Great leaders
couch their hopes and dreams in reality, however – one could hope to fly an
airplane but will probably not realistically accomplish that without the proper
training, practice and experience. One
could hope to lead others upon a path to success but will probably not be able
to do so unless (or until) they are properly equipped with the skills and training
needed to lead (rather than to order, direct or manage) others. One could expect to earn a six figure income
and be well prepared for retirement by the age of 50 but will probably not do
so without training, a specialized skill and good planning. Hopes and expectations are necessary if one
is to succeed but we also must have REALISTIC hopes and expectations that align
with our skills, abilities, experience, potential and desires.
