WHAT IS WRONG WITH CONVENTIONAL WISDOM?

 

Summer becomes but a memory for most as Labor Day signals the transition from warm sunny days to cool crisp mornings.  Fall signals the transformation of nature with trees exchanging their coats of green for hues of yellow, red and orange.  Once soft grass becomes brown and brittle under our feet.  Lakes lose their blue luster, taking on the drab grey reflected from a cloudy autumn sky.  For those accepting conventional wisdom – and there is plenty of that to go around – summer fades as quickly as flowers exposed to the season’s first frost.  For those seeking their own reality, however, a change in season can bring a new beginning.

As a summer person, I hold onto the season for as long as possible.  Rationalizing that there is less congestion on the lake in September and October than in August, I replace summer’s cloak of mosquitoes with woolen blankets, venturing out for a nightly vigil upon the waters.  Such were the thoughts that filled my mind this past Labor Day while watching the endless parade of boats leave the lake.  Following conventional wisdom, those lining up to leave “at a reasonable time when the water was warm” were reaping traditional rewards.  They could look forward to an early arrival home, an evening of unpacking and cleaning-up before returning to work.  While they might be prepared for a change in season, those leaving early would also feel a bit emptiness.  They would no longer immerse themselves in the peace of the lake…the sight of a sunset or a sunrise…the reflection of their reality upon the surface of the still waters – exchanging their summer bliss for several seasons of “reality.”  Those following the crowd will share both the rewards and the regrets of their fellow travelers.

To my surprise, however, as I drifted lazily past the flotilla awaiting retrieval from the calmest waters of the season, I saw an occasional individual bucking the trend by launching a boat against the tide of ships abandoning their stations.  While I may not welcome the handful of battered and bruised vessels being inserted into the lake by these “Johnny-come-lately” folk (often driven by individuals more curious about the water than experienced in operating a boat) they were at least actively moving against the tide to discover peaceful treasures left behind by the fair-weather crowd.

Important life-lessons can be learned when one takes the time to watch the little things that happen around us.  While watching the mass exodus from the lake I noticed the “yellow ski boat” that terrorized a quiet bay every weekend – its owners noisily greeting the dawn and saying goodnight to the dusk – throughout the summer.  A faded green speedboat fitted with a trolling motor and multiple fishing poles slipped quietly into the water as its replacement.  I saw the wake board boats that filled their bladders with water to create rolling surf (rather than small waves) – virtual walls of water that crashed against the shore, rocking paddle boards and kayaks wildly as they travelled slowly along the shore (their radios often blasting behind them as if to say, “look at me…I am here”).  Personal Watercrafts bobbed silently upon the calm surface awaiting a return to their winter nests – no longer buzzing like mad hornets, the noisy beasts saddened by their premature exit from a summer of relative freedom.  Though not present yet, silent floating duck blinds will soon replace the turmoil now leaving the lake – all part of an ongoing continuum without a defined beginning nor a clear-cut end.  Only when one recognizes that much can come from seeking a different path than the one chosen by the crowd can he or she realize that one individual loss can become another’s gain…that what may be an end for some can become a beginning for others…that as memories of a fulfilling past fade for some, dreams of a yet to be discovered future become reality to those thinking and acting outside of the “conventional wisdom” arena.

Nature senses a change in activity as the seasons change.  Where once the lakefront was crowded with ducks seeking scraps of bread from a well-wishing neighbor it becomes sanctuary to a lone bald eagle perched in the top of a small oak tree watching the shallow water intently for its next meal.  Had I followed conventional wisdom and left with the crowd, two blue herons perched silently upon the top of a boat lift would have gone unnoticed.  I may not have seen the spectacle of two swans preening themselves then standing in the shallow water near shore, expanding their presence by majestically stretching their wings outwards to a threatening five-foot span (hissing at my curious dog who wandered a bit too close to their perceived territory).  Fishermen fill the now tranquil waters surrounded by the splash of fish leaping up through the surface just beyond their reach seemingly laughing at the futility of their efforts, The joyful laughter of children swimming no longer overshadows the haunting cries of gulls as they dive relentlessly down towards unsuspecting prey just beneath the surface of the otherwise quiet lake.  To those following the crowd I say “thank you” for leaving those of us intentionally choosing to witness such rich rewards and hope that you found what you were seeking while we relish what you left behind for us to enjoy.

Far too many individuals diminish their potential by following the crowd in today’s hectic world.  They chose to take the easy route – the path of least resistance – and in so doing lose any chance they may have to establish their individuality.  People often suffer in silence rather than identifying and addressing the issues that most concern them.  They do what everyone else does so as not to attract attention or establish unwanted expectations.  Peer pressure drives decisions, a “flock” mentality replacing what was once individual choice.  Saying “no” to conventional wisdom – and in doing so establishing one’s own hopes, dreams and reality – should never be viewed as being detrimental to the whole.  Had Fulton listened to conventional wisdom would the boats that exited the lake have ever evolved from his steam engine?  Had Edison listened to conventional wisdom would he have harnessed and refined electricity?  Had the Wright brothers listened to conventional wisdom would the airplanes that travel far above us in the sky ever have joined the eagles and gulls as they soar effortlessly upon the winds?  What might YOU be able to accomplish – what potential might you be able to realize – if you were to refuse conventional wisdom while seeking your own reality?

KNOWLEDGE IS A REQUIREMENT FOR – BUT NOT A GUARANTEE OF – WISDOM, SUCCESS AND HAPPINESS

We are told from an early age that knowledge is the key to success.  If we learn we will achieve.  If we set our sights high when establishing our goals and objectives – and work hard to equip ourselves with the knowledge to accomplish our goals – great things will happen.  For most, the sky has been painted as “the limit” to success.  In front of each of us lies an endless continuum of possibilities – IF we pay attention in school, learn what is presented and “never stop learning” throughout life.  Knowledge alone, however, is NOT the key that will open all doors so why do people work so hard to absorb it?  A wise question that has many answers.

Wisdom is said to be the application of knowledge.  Knowing facts, details or information does not make one a leader, respected, successful OR a friend.  Individuals chosen to participate on the TV gameshow Jeopardy demonstrate a vast knowledge base – an unending ability to recall what many would consider useless facts and an astounding grasp of history, trivia and culture – BUT do often do nothing to demonstrate any more success outside of this knowledge-based world than anyone else.  Many intelligent individuals possessing all the “book knowledge” available to them lack the common sense and practical experience to make good decisions or know which way to turn when given unguided choices.  The application of knowledge through wise choices, decisions and actions that anticipate consequences (both planned and unintended) is what defines success, demands respect and demonstrates the attainment of wisdom – particularly if one does not care who gets the credit for the results that are achieved.  Knowledge allows us to think about issues, topics and challenges from many different (but previously defined) perspectives.  Wisdom – the application of knowledge – allows us to succeed by putting what we have learned and know into action.

Some individuals learn through reading books.  Others are more experiential in their learning as they best understand through listening or doing.  While we need educated teachers, engineers, doctors, managers and other professionals to study, practice and learn so they can lead, teach and create, others can make a difference by applying the knowledge they attain through experience to situations that do not require a formal education.  Trade schools provide knowledge that can be applied within technical careers (manufacturing, tool and die, machinists, carpenters, mechanics and a plethora of other significant occupations that contribute greatly to society).  Certificate programs can focus learning to a narrow slice of knowledge that can be directly applied to a defined situation or a specific career.  Though our grade schools, high schools and places of higher education equip us with information that is vital and necessary to survive in this world, we must continually stretch our knowledge base throughout life so we can accept new challenges by applying our knowledge wisely to eliminate roadblocks or the expand our responsibilities.  We seek the seeds of prosperity when we learn but, when we apply our knowledge wisely, we can see it grow into endless fields of opportunity.

Many have been told that “seeing” or “knowing” is believing when it comes to understanding or accepting a resolution that has been enacted.  Knowledge is nothing until it is linked to action, responsibility, accountability and focused follow-through.  We can know much without making a difference unless (and until) we act on our knowledge by putting it into action.  We can know much without making a difference unless we take responsibility for our actions – learn from our mistakes – then move on to accomplish our next objective.  We can know much without making a difference until we act on our beliefs, assumptions and thoughts so that something can be moved forward rather than being allowed to stagnate. 

We should seek knowledge but strive for ways to apply what we learn to better ourselves and those around us.  We should establish goals and seek to accomplish them but understand success is not simply the fulfillment of a stated objective having no purpose or meaning.  Success is not measured by what we have or what we do but rather by what we can accomplish with the gifts we are given and how we can apply the knowledge we attain – how we are able to impact, influence or enlighten others as we demonstrate wisdom through the application of all we know and all we have experienced.  It is not elevating, enabling or providing for others that makes a difference – it is fulfilling our own potential as we vacate a “station” in life which another can fill IF they, too, wisely apply their knowledge.

Nothing changes until something that has always been becomes something different.  When we seek to attain knowledge, it should be purposeful – with all learning directed towards the accomplishment of an objective or the realization of a dream.  Knowing for the sake of knowing may allow us to win the game of Jeopardy but applying what we know to the accomplishment of everyday problems, issues and situation will provide us a much better opportunity to win the game of life.

DOES PRIDE HELP SOLVE PROBLEMS OR IS IT PURELY PROBLEMATIC?

Pride becomes a driver as insecure people seek to bring to fruition their internal perceptions by de-valuing the thoughts and ideas of others.  While most prideful individuals think and act with self-gain as a motivation, selfless actions can become the impetus for monumental change if performed unconditionally without anticipation or expectation of personal recognition or reward.  Those who act selflessly in their pursuit of success (happiness or contentment) will almost always receive (without asking) rewards that are of a far greater magnitude than the effort required to bring them to fruition.  Those that pursue success through their self-serving (and depreciating) acts may achieve a modicum of success but will rarely become all that they were meant to be in their work, their relationships or their lives...pride truly does come before a fall in many cases.

When driven by pride it is much easier to display moral and ethical weakness to those around you (as your drivers are to attain status, recognition or wealth rather than respect, trust and value) than it is to be morally and ethically strong as demonstrated through actions fostered by selfless sincerity.  We tend to become more like those with whom we choose to associate than those we might wish to be as we reflect the actions, values and perspectives of those around us (even though we may keep the attitudes we might wish to portray hidden deeply within the shadows).  It is no mistake that people tend to gravitate towards others like who they are (rather than seeking those they might wish to be like) but so much more can come from learning by others “walking the walk” than can be learned from those “talking the talk.” 

Pride can destroy relationships.  When one loves (or finds great comfort in) him- or herself there is often very little room left for anyone else.  The feeling of self-advancement caused by caring for “number one” can cloud what might be an obvious choice – blurring an otherwise clear decision or directive that would benefit the whole as much as (if not more than) one individual.  When one puts the needs of others first while making decisions, even a good idea (which may not be the “best” solution) can be provide the best results due to the support and invested interest it receives from stakeholders.  When pride elevates the desires of “one” above the needs of others, failure becomes not a matter of “if” but rather of “when” and the possibility of undesirable outcomes moves from “possible” to “probable.” 

Strong, unselfish people learn how to resolve what they can, recognize what is beyond their personal capability to control, and seek help (with humility) when initiating change that could be beyond their ability to personally initiate.  When a person focuses more on results than worrying about who receives the credit, great things can happen. When an individual focuses on “...what is in it for ME?” rather than on “...what is in it for US?” the focus becomes prideful, selfish (AND ineffective). 

Prideful Individuals:

• 
  Devalue the work, efforts, contributions and value of others
• Claim individual ownership of the other’s results
• Consistently puts his or her own welfare ahead of anyone else
• Have difficulty hearing others when they make suggestions or try to initiate change as they are typically speaking rather than listening
• Think they “know everything,” failing to see the need to “learn anything” or defer to the wisdom, experience or ideas of others
• Will begin to spiral towards obsolescence once they feel they have “arrived,” unless they continue to seek life’s lessons from the people, places and things around them needed to grow
• Use deferral is an ally – if unable to shift fault to others they often remain silent (as if nothing had happened) or excuse a mistake as being a decision based on bad information
• Find it hard to say, “Thank you” or “I am sorry” (as they are not truly grateful to acknowledge another’s contributions and reticent to admit to their own mistakes) 
• Do not feel compelled to move onward, upward, or outward.  They are often so content with “what is” (often due to their own actions) that they could care less about “what could be” (with a little extra effort or additional fore thought) 
• Often feel and act as though “above” the rules (which obviously control, apply to or were developed to control someone else) and clearly superior to anyone else.  

Unselfish Individuals:

• Act with consistency and reasonableness – treating everyone equitably based upon their contributions to the whole (as opposed to equally where everyone is considered to be the same) 
• Speak with sincerity when giving directions, suggestions or comments – taking the time to explain not only the “what” but also the “why” of each request and remaining available to help (but not in charge) as tasks are performed and issues arise
• Explain both the rewards of accomplishment and the results of failure – then help those performing tasks to discover the road to success
• Allow themselves to be lifted “up the ladder” upon the outstretched hands of those around them rather than “climbing over them as if they were the rungs of a ladder on the way to the top”
• Watch and listen attentively to others, acting appropriately upon what is seen and heard...willing to accepting responsibility for decisions, changing their mind when conditions change and giving others the ability to learn from their mistakes
• Give credit when it is due and provide guidance when change is required. 
• Accept blame for the mistakes for which they are ultimately responsible
• Help others learn from (rather than being destroyed for) their mistakes
• Recognize that the growth of a group or organization...of a relationship...is an end-goal rather than simply a step on the way towards self-fulfillment. 
  

If you claim individual credit or responsibility for the things that “go right” while shifting the blame for shortcomings or deflecting criticism towards others as an excuse for mistakes you may find yourself alone at the top – standing precariously upon the unwilling backs of those you stepped over while rising.  If you speak softly as you act loudly – praise generously while accepting accolades reluctantly – you will find yourself pulling others with you as you achieve all that you can by becoming all that you hope to be.

WHAT INSPIRES YOUR PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL ACCOMPLISHMENTS?

The road to success in life is often paved with the thoughts, experiences and inspiration of others.  How we react to those messages can either make or break us as leaders, individuals, partners or friends.  Some axioms that have impacted my sense of individual success in business, personal accomplishment or relationships include those listed in this Deliberation.  Do YOU have an inspirational thought or axiom that helps to motivate YOUR personal success?  Please leave a note and share how it may have impacted you in response to this BLOG.

“The highest courage (we can exhibit) is daring to be ourselves in the face of adversity.”  How many times do we take the easy path rather than choosing the “road less traveled?”  How often do we seek the path of least resistance rather than taking a stand for what is right – for what we know to be true – regardless of the personal cost?  Being true to yourself by openly expressing your ideals and honestly revealing your beliefs to others – regardless of what they may think about you – is not always the easiest route to take BUT it almost always returns the greatest rewards.  Great rewards are rarely the result of minimal investment…whether it be in life, in finances, in work or in relationships.  One cannot fully maximize their return without fully committing their investments.

“There is never a wrong time to do the right thing” is the foundation upon which ongoing and sustainable success should be built.  Individuals attempting to portray perfection in whatever they do or say spend much more time avoiding (or excusing) what is wrong than they do striving to accomplish what is right.  Trying to do all the things necessary to be an exemplary leader (partner or friend) rather than simply leading (or living) by example often establishes roadblocks in our lives that are very difficult to avoid.  True success is more a measure of who one is while nobody is looking – by the substance of our dreams and the extent of our aspirations – than it is a testament to those things that we do in public in order to receive accolades or recognition.  Truly considering possibilities, ramifications of decisions and alternative directions (as well as different outcomes) may take a bit more planning time but usually eliminates the extra time spent righting a wrong.

“We cannot lower the mountain so we must elevate ourselves.”  This is sage wisdom for an individual seeking to climb the ladder of success.  We cannot expect mountains to become molehills on their own – we must rise to the top of every challenge, continuously moving forward even though we may fall temporarily back, as we aspire to reach the pinnacle if we are to succeed.  When we lower the bar by reducing our expectations…by seeking a lower threshold than we might be capable of reaching in order to make our journey shorter or our chance of failure less…we minimize the potential that our efforts will produce. 

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”  Many people find satisfaction in bringing the hopes and dreams of others to fruition.  Others find such satisfaction hollow – preferring to realize their own dreams.  If one never attempts to accomplish their individual dreams, he or she will never fail or be disappointed.  (Rarely, however, will a person having insignificant goals or setting low standards for their own performance ever be happy with their accomplishments).  When we do not establish a target – formalize a dream – we can never truly taste the success of our individual accomplishments for we will forever accomplish only what others might mandate or prescribe.  

Some people say things and say “Why?”  Others dream things and say, “Why not?”  NEVER accept things as they are without questioning if that is the way they should always be.  Rather seek what might be best regardless of what is being currently being done or has been accomplished in the past.  Asking others “why” they are doing something (or why they are choosing NOT to do it) defaults your boundaries to the limits they set in response to your experience.  Asking “why not” do something differently…or think about a different outcome…expands these boundaries to the limits established within your own mind – stretching what has been probable into what might be possible. 

Effort and courage are not enough without purpose and direction.  Life is an ongoing series of events whose purpose is revealed only when we exhibit the courage to remain singularly strong in the face of adversity – when we make a conscious and intentional decision to do what is right rather than being concerned about avoiding what is wrong.  When we look ahead – take every step intentionally and with a defined purpose - we keep our focus forward towards where we are going rather than worrying obsessively about where we have been.  Though one can never get lost if he or she does has not considered where they want to be nor where they are going, one will never know if they have reached a destination until it has been purposefully (and publicly) expressed after being intentionally determined.  While some say that they “do not know what they do not know,” it is just as impossible to “know when you have arrived” if you do not know where you wish to end up.

Much can be gained if we identify our dreams and acknowledge their existence (then take intentional action to bring them to fruition) than will ever be accomplished by taking the easy road or accepting the first option available.  We must believe in ourselves (and in those we hold dear around us) to move forward through life.  We should accept nothing less than our best if we wish to experience sustainable and long-lasting success, enjoy the fruits of our labor or bring to fruition all that we might possibly become if we wish to achieve personal or professional success.  Leaning on axioms or inspirational thoughts can often help us to become more than we might have imagined possible as they stretch our thoughts, experiences and aspirations into things not yet considered and goals not yet confirmed.