THE POSSIBILITIES (AND PITFALLS) OF DOING MULTIPLE THINGS AT ONCE

Individuals able to accomplish several tasks at one time often feel as though everyone should be able to do the same. After all, what competent person should not be able to talk on the phone while reading a book and watching television? Some say that people trying to accomplish more than one project at a time may actually be less efficient than those “slow dinosaurs” preferring to complete one task before moving on to the next. Whether you are a single-focused person or a juggler of many balls at one time, consider the following: 

·         People who multitask can be less efficient than those who complete one project then move on to the next because shifting focus increases the complexity of a task creating multiple starts and stops – along with the re-establishment of a focused mindset – each time one moves from one project to another. Being able to “compartmentalize” issues allows us to move smoothly from one to the next without losing sight of the end goal BUT not all individuals are able to walk away then return without “missing a beat.” Selectively focusing allows one to accomplish things in priority – setting aside those things that can wait while working on those that cannot. While difficult for those that tend to finish one task before moving on to another, individuals able to multi-task have developed the ability to shift gears without letting progress previously made prior to it being set aside diminish.

·         When individuals able to shift from one task to the next without losing momentum do so it is usually because they need a break or run into a temporary obstacle. When those unable to shift gears easily it is often because they wish to find satisfaction elsewhere or meet someone else’s critical need quicker.  Whenever we move from a task – whatever the reason we left it – returning requires us to shift gears AND resolve/accept the reasons you shifted focus in the first place. If you shifted to accomplish something else, nothing should be lost from the progress you had made but if left a task stymied and wasting time pursuing dead ends, a forced return prior to developing fresh perspectives would not put you into a position to produce immediate results. 

·         Managing two mental tasks, particularly with the same part of your brain, reduces the available brainpower for either task. If one MUST multi-task it should involve different thought processes (logical vs. creative) so that the brain need not “wipe itself” to think about a new cognitive process using the same part of one’s mind. Weeding out distractions helps one focus on the important things without chasing red herrings.  It is tough to listen to your favorite song on the radio while carrying on a conversation as you are using the same part of your brain for two things. The more different tasks are (developing a budget or taking a plant tour), the easier it will be to switch “mental focus” back and forth without distraction.

·         Short-term memory loss or changes in one’s ability to concentrate are signals they have pushed too far or tried to do too many things at one time. If one cannot remember what he or she was doing recently (when they normally can without any issues), the brain may be working too hard to pull everything together – most likely prohibiting it from accomplishing any one thing effectively.

·         The more often a person does a task, the less thought it takes to perform it. Practice not only “makes perfect,” it frees up more of the brain to do other things, as less thought is required. While we typically use only 10% of our mental capacity, we must work hard to open the paths and thought processes we do not often use if we are to expand the possibilities that a fully leveraged brain has to offer. 

Some individuals are “wired” to identify one objective, work it to its logical conclusion, then move on to the next challenge. Others are able to work on several tasks at a time without any negative impact on their results. If you are able to juggle multiple balls while accomplishing much, it is probably not right to expect the same of everyone else.  Similarly, if you need quiet to focus and concentrate on accomplishing singularly defined objectives, do not expect all around you to work in the same methodical manner. Those doing many things seemingly at one time must develop the patience that would allow them to accept a more “thought-centric” pace as being reasonable, responsible, prudent, and sound. Likewise, those needing the time to develop a single solution before moving on should encourage and support those that race ahead. It is no more “right” to expect everyone to multi-task than it is to expect everyone to follow through without considering multiple options at a time. While the tortoise has been said to have won the race, the hare did accomplish much and see more along the way when he left the straight and narrow to experience much of what life offered during the journey. 

Consider a person’s strengths, weaknesses, and learning style before assigning work or expecting them to accomplish several activities at one time. If you want others to handle more than one thing at a time, help them to focus, compartmentalize, and move from one task to a completely new and different task (with an understanding that a return to what they are doing is eminent) rather than fretting about things not yet accomplished (feeling they abandoned the last project before it was done). 

An effective team needs both turtles and rabbits – those able to move quickly and those willing to plod patiently along. Recognizing how to utilize both sets of strengths will make you a much more effective manager. Learning to value the contribution of both will make you more efficient and effective as you lead and motivate others to accomplish all that they were meant to do. 

A GOOD EXAMPLE IS FAR MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY GREAT DIRECTIVE

Why does it seem lately that when the “going gets tough…” many people start blaming rather than showing that “…the tough get going?” It is rare that, during the heat of an argument, someone will stop the conversation to take responsibility for the misunderstanding by saying, “We should really stop arguing – it was not your fault. I totally take the blame for the problems we must address.” More often than not, an argument is peppered with, “It was your fault!” or “We never would have been in this position had listened to me in the first place!” What about the infamous “I am sorry that you misinterpreted what I said…” rather than saying “I was wrong when we were talking the other day.” Most people find it hard to accept responsibility for a mistake (but will easily and quickly claim credit for success (whether or not it was truly warranted). Far too many people live "behind the curtains" like the Wizard of Oz – dictating what others are to do rather than living as if their house were made of glass, having no shades or blinds, where all they said or did would be revealed as an example of how best to act, live and succeed. 

Leading by example – by being what you are and accepting the ramifications of whatever that might cause rather than trying to assume as your own the accolades given to others for what they may have accomplished within your realm of responsibility – goes a long way towards establishing credibility and validating the values you might wish to express. Before taking credit for another’s success, assigning blame for a personal shortcoming, or taking the opportunity to distract from your mistakes by pointing out to others how much THEY could learn from their mistakes, take a moment to reflect upon our natural tendency to avoid ownership by saying “do as I say, not as I do.” Rather than detracting or deflecting, seek ways that your actions (and words) might allow you to lead by example (encouraging others to follow you because they WANT to) rather than by edict (expecting others to follow you because they have been ordered or told to do so) – be it at work or within your personal life and relationships.  

It is hard to convince others NOT to do something when they see you do similar things yourself. How can you expect your employees to adhere to an “eight to five” schedule if your own day frequently begins at eight fifteen and/or ends at four thirty? People living life within their “house of glass” tend to be more aware of their actions (and the ramifications of the things they choose to do OR intentionally refuse to do) than do individuals who are able to lurk within the dark recesses of their minds. People tend to believe what they SEE and HEAR their leaders DOING and SAYING (as it must be acceptable or “the boss,” parent, or partner would not do it). If a leader consistently comes to work late, leaves early, or wastes time during the day, how can his/her employees be expected to think that punctuality and good time management is more important than what has been demonstrated as being acceptable? Parents tell their children to obey the rules (as they break the speed limit or are caught in a multitude of “white lies” not intended to hurt anyone). We expect our partner, our children, and our employees to listen to us unequivocally – often without giving them a valid or concrete reason to do so. Rather than seeking and earning respect, far too many feel that it is their “birthright” to claim such a prize – declaring themselves “legitimate” without having been tested or proving themselves qualified. While none of us is perfect, thoughts that might help us to better lead by example would include: 

1)        Recognize that words are but whispers compared to the shouts of our actions. Those close to us may be able to hear what we say (if they are inclined to listen and motivated to act) but anyone having an unobstructed view of what we do will be influenced (positively or negatively) by what they see. Children are taught that “seeing is believing,” not that “doing as you are told – without thought or hesitation – makes things right.” Whether you interact with people as a manager, a peer, a friend, or as part of a family, what you do and how you act – NOT the things you say about yourself or TELL others to do – are the characteristics that help to identify your strengths and morale character. 

2)        Look for the good in others – loudly praising their positive actions, interactions and results while quietly addressing their shortcomings, inadequacies, or opportunities to learn. People usually see what others do wrong but rarely recognize or acknowledge what they have done right. Children are “expected” to be well behaved in public, so it is rare that we hear a parent say to their child, “You are really being a good shopper today – I am so proud of you!”.  Rather it is “do not touch…” “wait until we get home…” or “You are never going shopping with me again!” Though we need to identify negative behavior and act to minimize unwanted consequences, we should also try to acknowledge and verbalize appreciation for things done well. The next time you are involved in a heated debate with someone you care about rather than saying “This is all your fault!” try to assume some of the responsibility yourself. People tend to react better when they know not only how they failed BUT ALSO what they may have done well…not only WHAT may have been done or discussed wrong BUT ALSO what might produce a better outcome next time.

 3)         Never cast the first stone in anger or frustration when judging others or dealing out discipline. Even if you take the time to open a window within your glass house before tossing your criticism out upon a friend or co-worker (intentionally saying EXACTLY what you wanted to say and do – even in a private setting), an individual scorned (or addressed) rarely takes time consider any collateral damage before returning fire (choosing to simply cast the rocks and stones of resentment back towards where they came from as a means of self-preservation and defense). 

 4)       People often defend their inappropriate actions by shifting focus and blame by saying “…but you did such and such so do NOT blame me if our outcomes were different than they should have been!”  When we expose our thoughts and actions fully to those around us, we have no place to hide our own errors and secrets and find ourselves more understanding not only of WHAT others do but also WHY they do things. We are less apt to see fault in the actions of other’s when we first examine ourselves to make sure that we are without blame (which, if we are honest with ourselves, is rarely the case). 

5)       Judge yourself using the same standards you apply to others. The greatest leaders of our times would never ask others to do what they would not do themselves. Truly great generals lead their troops into battle rather than following them from behind. Parents must “walk the talk” if they want their children to learn. Managers cannot expect loyalty, efficiency, and a good utilization of time from their employees without demonstrating it themselves. Those within a relationship cannot expect their partner to do or be anything that they are not willing to do or be themselves.  

We all live in a “glass house” of some kind. Regardless of how much we may wish to hide our thoughts, actions and attitudes from the world while expressing our wishes, desires, and directives, what others believe us to be is shaped by what they see when we think we are alone...what they hear when we do not believe they are listening. When we view our lives as being acted out within a glass house – one without shades to hide what we do or say – we begin to concentrate on what we should be doing rather than focusing on what others should not be doing. When our actions speak louder than our words – reinforcing the things we intentionally set out to do rather than expecting others to accomplish what we would not attempt ourselves – what we say becomes a clarification of what we expect rather than an initiator of action. Much can be accomplished when others act by following a positive example rather than responding to fulfill self-serving declarations. Far more can be accomplished when those around us seek validation from a respected individual and thrive upon the approval their actions receive rather than desperately trying to escape or avoid our criticism. It has been said that more can be realized through the appropriate application of honey than through the overbearing delivery of a one-sided altercation having no identifiable beginning or eagerly anticipated end.

PROBLEMATIC PRIDE…

Pride becomes a driver as insecure people seek to bring to fruition their internal perceptions by de-valuing the thoughts and ideas of others. Most prideful individuals think and act with self-gain as a motivation BUT selfless actions can become the impetus for monumental change if performed unconditionally without anticipation or expectation of personal recognition. Those who act selflessly in their pursuit of success (happiness or contentment) will almost always receive (without asking) rewards that are of a far greater magnitude than the effort required to bring them to fruition. Those that pursue success through self-serving (and depreciating) acts may achieve a modicum of success but will rarely become all that they were meant to be in their work, their relationships, or their lives. 

Those driven by pride tend to expose their moral and ethical weakness more easily to those around them (as their drivers are to attain status, recognition, or wealth rather than respect, trust, and value) than those who are morally and ethically strong (as demonstrated by their actions fostered by selfless sincerity). We tend to become more like those with whom we choose to associate than those we might wish to be as we reflect upon the actions, values, and perspectives of those around us (often keeping the attitudes we might wish to portray hidden deeply within the shadows). People tend to gravitate towards others like themselves (rather than seeking those they might wish to be like) BUT so much more could fill our lives if we were to learn from others “walking the walk” rather than paying attention to those who more often “talk the talk.” 

Pride can destroy relationships. When one loves (or finds great comfort in) him- or herself, there is often very little room left for anyone else. The feeling of self-advancement caused by caring for “number one” can cloud what might be an obvious choice – blurring an otherwise clear decision or directive that would benefit the whole as much as (if not more than) one individual. When one puts the needs of others first while making decisions, even a good idea (which may not be the “best” solution) can provide the best results due to the support and invested interest it receives from stakeholders. When pride elevates the desires of “one” above the needs of others, failure becomes not a matter of “if” but rather of “when” and the possibility of undesirable outcomes moves from “possible” to “probable.” 

Strong, unselfish people learn how to resolve what they can, recognize what is beyond their personal capability to control, and seek help (with humility) when initiating change that could require thoughts or actions that are beyond their ability to personally initiate. When a person focuses more on results than worrying about who receives the credit, great things can happen. When an individual focuses on “...what is in it for ME?” rather than on “...what is in it for US?” the focus becomes prideful, selfish (AND ineffective). Several clarifiers that can help to differentiate between selfish and unselfish would include: 

Prideful (or Selfish) Individuals tend to: 

• Devalue the work, efforts, contributions, and value of others.
• Claim individual ownership of the other’s results.
• Consistently puts his or her own welfare ahead of anyone else.
• Have difficulty hearing others when they make suggestions or try to initiate change as they are typically speaking rather than listening.
• Think they “know everything,” failing to see the need to “learn anything” or defer to the wisdom, experience or ideas of others.
• Put “me first” and you far down the path from significance.
• Will begin to spiral towards obsolescence once they feel they have “arrived,” failing to seek life’s lessons from the people, places and things should they seek to grow.
• Use deferral is an ally – if unable to shift fault to others they often remain silent (as if nothing had happened) or excuse a mistake as being a decision based on bad information.
• Find it hard to say, “Thank you” or “I am sorry” (as they are not truly grateful to acknowledge another’s contributions and reticent to admit to their own mistakes) 
• Do not feel compelled to move onward, upward, or outward, often being content with “what is” (often due to their own actions) that they could care less about “what could be” (with a little extra effort or additional fore thought) 
• Often feel and act as though “above” the rules (which obviously control, apply to, or were developed to control others) and act clearly superior to anyone else.  

Unselfish Individuals tend to: 

• Act with consistency and reasonableness – treating everyone equitably based upon their contributions to the whole (as opposed to equally where everyone is considered to be the same regardless of abilities or emotional intelligence) 
• Speak with sincerity when giving directions, suggestions or comments – taking the time to explain not only the “what” but also the “why” of each request and remaining available to help with (but not assume control of) tasks being performed when issues arise
• Explain both the rewards of accomplishment and the results of failure – then encourage those performing tasks to discover the road to success by helping them up when they fall, providing resources for them to make decisions and allowing them to learn from their mistakes.
• Allow themselves to be lifted “up the ladder” upon the outstretched hands of those around them rather than “climbing over them as if they were the rungs of a ladder on which they climb as they move towards the top.
• Watch and listen attentively to others, acting appropriately upon what is seen and heard...willing to accepting responsibility for decisions and permitting themselves to change their minds when conditions change.
• Give credit when it is due (often publicly) and provide guidance or corrective action when needed (always privately). 
• Accept blame for the mistakes for which they are ultimately responsible (and often those that they COULD have prevented but did not).
• Help others learn from (rather than being destroyed for) the things that could have been done better (or differently)
• 
  Recognize that the growth of a group or organization...of a relationship...is a step on the way towards self-fulfillment rather than an end goal that needs no further nourishment. 

If you claim individual credit or responsibility for the things that “go right” while shifting the blame for shortcomings or deflecting criticism towards others as an excuse for mistakes, you may find yourself alone at the top – standing precariously upon the unwilling backs of those you stepped over while rising. If you speak softly as you act loudly – praise generously while accepting accolades reluctantly – you will find yourself pulling others with you as you achieve all that you can by becoming all that you hope to be. Set aside prideful and pride-driven thoughts, actions, and inclinations…you will find that helping others grow, succeed, thrive, and become confident contributors is much more fulfilling than any short-lived, self-derived credit that putting your own wants and placing yourself first could ever provide.

TIMES CHANGE…DO YOU?

Everyone comes to a fork in the road – a decision point that forever changes what they have done, redirecting all efforts and activities FROM what they have been TOWARDS the accomplishment of what they have yet to become. When we trap ourselves within a world of excuses by defaulting to what might have happened “if only” we had acted differently (while doing nothing to change the way we look at, address or act in response to a situation), we will never experience anything different than we have already lived, felt, and attained. “If only…” will never define “what is…” or “what could be…” should we truly wish to alter the course of our lives and the way we make decisions. Dwelling upon things NOT accomplished (or done poorly) will never initiate change as that tends to reinforce your limitations by rationalizing what has already been said and done (rather than celebrating your abilities and the way they could be applied to seek an alternative reality).

We will never experience our full potential by seeking comfort within a world defined by our past OR by other’s expectations – by doing what is required ONLY by doing it EXACTLY as we are told (without considering how it might be done better) or as it has always been done (without seeking to improve past practices). Life is not a spectator sport – it requires careful consideration, insightful planning, and the intentional implementation of action. Most successful individuals establish basic tenants for their life – rules they use to hold themselves accountable for their own actions. Five significant “truths” that should be considered as one chooses which path to take when confronted with a fork in the road – the trail providing the “highest return on investment” while identifying and maintaining an acceptable level of risk – would include the following:

• It is OK to make a mistake AS LONG AS the same mistake is not repeated with no intention to change or avoid the negative outcome. It is OK to make a wrong decision – any well-thought-out decision is better than no decision – even if the decision might be to delay making one until further research allows us to make an informed choice – but it is NOT all right to avoid deciding just to minimize confrontation, discomfort or fear of the unknown. It is OK to try and fail – as long as we learn from our failures – but it is NOT alright to expect different results by doing the same things and making the same mistakes as we have always done. Learn from your errors, using them as a springboard to propel you forward.
• Focus on things you can control. Identify obstacles that are within your sphere of influence and actively seek to eliminate the hurdles you cannot control by giving them to someone who has the ability to influence them. As you grow, seek to identify the factors you cannot influence or control (but could accomplish MUCH if you could) and either attempt to gain the experience, ability or authority to change them or find ways they can be overcome (or you will never move from where you are to where you wish to be). As you identify obstacles and navigate through troubled waters, maintain a narrow focus upon what is immediately ahead of you (rather than looking several miles down the road when the potholes are right in front of you) so that progress can be made one step at a time.
• Results are recognized – effort is merely a means to the end. If one seeks praise for working hard or contributing, he/she will often be disappointed by life’s realities. Let recognition (and satisfaction) come your way through the results your effort achieves (whether or not anyone else speaks openly about them) rather than seeking praise or validation for each step you take along the way. In the end, we can find satisfaction, purpose and value ONLY in what we see, do, experience and accomplish – and how those things might impact or benefit others – when we fulfill our own expectations rather than seeking outward praise from others.
• All individuals may speak, question, and have a voice in any decision but that does not mean all votes are equal. Life is not a democracy. Input is valued but individuals responsible for the ultimate success of any endeavor must – and will - make the final decision. Do not confuse “equal” with “equitable” as you seek to identify and establish new opportunities. All individuals have different gifts, attributes and experiences that, when applied proportionately to a decision, can have a significant impact. If all such attributes were treated equally, however, decisions may never be made and goals might never be accomplished as too much talk and equality can hinder the decision-making process and keep acceptable risk from being taken.
• There is nothing that “cannot be done” (and rarely anything that cannot be “undone”). While some solutions may not be cost-effective, are simply impractical or beyond our ability to implement, an “I cannot…” “It is not possible,” and “Nobody would do it that way…” attitudes is not acceptable. Well thought-out solutions to issues you may encounter in life are not reasons for celebration, they are simply expectations of the way you should continually exhibit and utilize your abilities as you move forward towards your intended destination…as you anticipate what the NEXT fork in your road might be rather than resting upon your laurels for choosing one correct path. Detours, roadblocks, and other disruptions often interfere with our progress when we make an initial decision but as long as we NEVER give up, give in or give away our ability to make a difference through the things we do, think or say, we will move from where we are to where we wish to be. A results-focused orientation is critical when choosing the right path to take and persistence is required to either follow through OR begin anew as one moves along the road less travelled. 

When choosing a path upon which you wish to travel, focus on (and expand upon) the things you have experienced and accomplished rather than dwelling upon the things that “COULD have been done IF ONLY you had not run out of time” or “Cannot be changed or modified because the ship has already sailed.”  Building from a foundation of “what is” (whether that be good, bad, or constantly changing) will always be more relevant to life than hiding behind “What could have been IF only…”  Seeking “what has yet to happen” as one looks to harvest the best fruits that life can offer will ALWAYS provide a better foundation upon which to build than “Why try?” or “What is done is done…” will ever provide.